A strong woman VS A woman of strength

I stumbled upon this beautifully written message in a friend's facebook page:

A strong woman works out every day to keep her body in shape ...
but a woman of strength kneels in prayer to keep her soul in shape...

A strong woman isn't afraid of anything ...
but a woman of strength shows courage in the midst of her fear...

A strong woman won't let anyone get the best of her ...
but a woman of strength gives the best of her to everyone...

A strong woman makes mistakes and avoids the same in the future...
a woman of strength realizes life's mistakes can also be God's blessings and capitalizes on them...

A strong woman walks sure footedly ...
but a woman of strength knows God will catch her when she falls...

A strong woman wears the look of confidence on her face ...
but a woman of strength wears grace...

A strong woman has faith that she is strong enough for the journey ...
but a woman of strength has faith that it is in the journey that she will become strong...

My prayer that Strong women will
Become “ women of strength”


Compiled by Suka Pasi Taufa


When the grace of God is missed, bitterness is born. But where the
grace of God is embraced, forgiveness flourishes. The longer we walked in the garden, the more likely we are to smell like flowers. The more we immerse ourselves in grace, the more likely we are to give grace.

A Letter From The Past

I came across a very interesting letter in my old highschool journal the other day. It reads:

Dear Elaine in 2009,

I turn 13 today. Mummy said to me this morning that I am an adult already. But I don't feel like one. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, like deep in thought kinda thinking ya know, and I wonder about you - or me in 10 years time. How's life treating you?

They had durian cake for my birthday. I know I should be happy. I am very lucky because my family loves me very much. But I don't know why I feel so sad. I look at myself in the mirror, and I want to vomit. Why is it that I am so fat and ugly? Do you still look like me in 10 years time? I see my friends getting boyfriends but no boys seem to even want to look at me.

I also don't know why I am so stupid. My friend said to me "Elaine, you have brains but you are stupid". I am not good in sports, I wear XL for everything. I am so sad. I am not good in anything. I cry all the time. Why did God even create me? Why do I have to suffer like this... can somebody please end this torture.

Have you met your prince charming yet? Is he tall, dark and handsome? Did he make your heart beat a thousand times in a minute? Is he romantic? Does he treat you well? How does it feel to be in love? I can't wait to fall in love! And let him carry me on a white horse, to his castle and we'll live happily ever after.

What do you do? Are you a florist? Probably not eh... coz mummy and papa only want me to study science. Sigh... nobody understands me and nobody gives me anything I want.

But what I really want to know is... did we make it till the end... are you happy now? Please do write back... I can't wait to read your letter!

Love,

Elaine in 1998

.

.

.

And I decided to write back:

Dear Elaine in 1998,

I'm glad I found your letter =) But first of all, you're in 1998 & I'm in 2009. That's 11 years dear, not 10 years. I think you really should stop falling asleep in class and actually do your mathematics homework.

I am a pharmacist now (you probably don't even know what that is). I help patients manage their medicines in a hospital. It is a very rewarding job as you actually do make a difference in people's lives. You're right, we did end up in science stream so I didn't get to be a florist. But I am taking  flower arrangement lessons and that is very enjoyable.

I still look like you, nothing much has changed but I did loose some baby fat. In 1 year's time you'll meet a boy (whom you have a huge crush on) tell you that he doesn't like fat & ugly girls. That's OKAY. Because that's your kick-off start to really start exercising lady!

You are not stupid, but you do make bad choices in choosing friends. Years of pain & hurt will later teach you to select your friends very carefully. You'll learn to allow only certain people to speak into your life. And in 2 years time, you will meet your Best Friend. His name is Jesus. He is the only person who will never let you down. So trust Him.

My prince charming... I thought I met him, but he didn't carry me off to his castle and we didn't have a happy ending. How does it feel like to be in love? Love is a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sprakle, cheeks to glow and blood pressure to rise. You know when you have found your prince because you not only have a smile on your face but in your heart as well. You also will know you're in love when you don't want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.

But, please wake up. Life is not a fairytale. You will face a lot of disappointments in the years to come. Its OK to cry. Crying is not a sign of weakness. You're lucky because you know how to express your emotions in the most natural way God allows us to. So stay strong, you will survive it all. Everything you are going through now is to prepare you for something bigger.

God remembers us whenever we are. He understands us more than anyone else in this world. Our concerns are His concerns. Our pain is His pain. So, live well and finish the race strong.

One last final advice for you, always listen to mum and dad. They love you very much and they really do know what's best for you =)

Love,

Elaine in 2009

As Christ's Vessels

This morning when I walked into my cardiology ward, I found a handwritten note sitting in one of my patient's case notes.

It reads:

Cancer is (not) contagious

And emphysema too

Lots of friends once came around

But now there’s very few

When you need someone to talk to

But no one comes around

The little things really get to you

 As more people let you down

I don’t know really what I’ve done

But it must have been real bad

As people that I know

Don’t come to talk and that’s so sad

Things were different back a while ago

When health was not the thing

“Can you help us,” was often heard

As your problems, you would bring

You don’t have to come and see me

When I’m on my bed

But at the moment come and have a talk

I’m just dying I’m not dead.

*Spelling and grammar slightly modified

My reaction after reading that – stunned.

Here I am, a young pharmacist always so eager to get all the work done as efficient as possible. Each morning I bustle in and out like a busy bee – counting down the discharges, writing up medication histories, printing off medication profiles and making sure I don’t have to stay back over time.

How many times have I forgotten that God has put me here in this hospital as a vessel for Christ. But what can I do? I often ask God. I still have no idea… How do you share Christ’s love and hope to patients in a hospital setting without being reported as “imposing personal faith” on them?

I don’t have the answers… but what this patient of mine wrote, has caused me as a pharmicist to just pause for a moment and reflect on my purpose of a being health professional. We have every opportunity to be more than just people who give out drugs, we can be a friend to them.

The Grass is Green Where You Water It

The sky is blue, the sun is bright and I cannot stop smiling . Mummy is here! Which means yummy food for ONE whole WEEK! nyehehehehe... papa don't jealous k? You'll get her back next week. Good stuff must share share... *teeheehee*

A bit of reflection this week...

I rolled over my pillow one morning and murmured quite happily, "You know Lord, it doesn't get any better than this. Its just me and You - how wonderful." Then I gasped as the impact of what I said hit me full force. I am happy, joyful and truly contented.

As compared to a few months ago when the only emotion I felt was despair. This transformation had to be supernatural work on God's part.

Though having said that, I have to admit I have my moments of unhappiness too. I am only human afterall. But I am happy where I'm at right now.

There's a saying that goes "The grass is always greener on the other side". But a wise person said to me this week "The grass is usually not greener on the other side. The grass is green wherever you water it". Coincidentally my previous post title was "Green Green Grass". haha!

This week has been extremely challenging - to my faith, my self esteem, my confidence as a pharmacist, my trust in my friends... Life is so interesting, isn't it? The hurdles that come our way are endless.

But for now, I lay content in the arms of my Saviour, letting Him rock me and love me... like no other human being can.

StickyNote of the week: Dare to dream, dare to hope. Dare to believe that I deserve to be loved. Dare to be just me - and dare to love myself as God loves me.

Green Green Grass

This blog has been left stagnant for quite a while. Which is actually a good indication that I have been extremely busy going out having fun and enjoying life . Its usually night time when I get into my melancholic mode that I seem to have stuff to write.

The word to sum up the past few weeks is - forgiveness. Learning to forgive the people who have hurt me 3 years ago, 4 months ago, last week, yesterday. I was once again reminded by God that forgiveness is like releasing a prisoner..... only to realize that the prisoner had always been myself.

We are wounded by life, by each other, by our poor choices or the poor choices of others. It is beyond our control. When your heart is broken, you want to be held, to be comforted. You want someone to tell you that everything is going to be okay. When those you turn to for help add to the weight of the brokenness, it is hard not to give into despair.

Sometimes, we experience a glimpse of healing from God, and yet we seem to be able to lose it in a moment - another careless word, work pressure, disappointment with ourselves or with others. I am learning that God's overwhelming love gives us the courage and grace to look at our wounds, no matter how deep or painful they are, and to bring them out of the dark into His light. And so... I was finally able to say honestly, "Yup, I have forgiven them".

And then a surprise at the gym today. How did I feel? A mixture of everything. Fear, anger, sadness, relief?, excitement, fear, hurt, confused, fear, amused?, horrified, terrified, fear. My first instinct - run!

Work has been a heaven as well as a nightmare. More about this next time but at the moment just surviving on God's grace and constantly reminding myself to say "forgive them, for they do not know what they're doing".

Fulfilling some of my 2009 resolutions - enrolled into a "Flower Arrangement" course for beginners and I've also learnt to bake pretty little cupcakes!

From this:

To this!

Some other things to look forward to - going canoe-ing with friends at Victor Harbour this long weekend and also an adventure trip to Hobart, Tasmania with Ling Fei this coming Easter. *weeeheee* And mummy coming to Adelaide this Saturday!